{"id":1295,"date":"2014-10-19T15:22:40","date_gmt":"2014-10-19T20:22:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/decidedlygrim.net\/forlorn\/?p=1295"},"modified":"2014-12-22T18:18:23","modified_gmt":"2014-12-23T00:18:23","slug":"european-despair-day-3-berlin-bust","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/decidedlygrim.net\/forlorn\/?p=1295","title":{"rendered":"European DeSpair, Day Three: Berlin Bust!"},"content":{"rendered":"

June 30, 2014<\/h2>\n

My compatriots and I have explored together for several\u00a0years and we’ve had very good luck – both at finding ways into buildings (our credo is to never break into places, just to look for entrances that already exist) and, most importantly, to not get caught! \u00a0And\u00a0especially\u00a0<\/em>to not get arrrested. \u00a0Well, we didn’t get arrested in Berlin, but our luck could not have gotten much worse.<\/p>\n

We started out the day heading to an abandoned amusement park. \u00a0Tours had been given here until recently but unfortunately they stopped them a couple of months before our visit. \u00a0So, we decided to sneak our way in. \u00a0We had no trouble finding a way in and were having a great time photographing the derelict beauty. \u00a0It’s truly one of the most beautiful abandonments I’d ever seen. \u00a0But\u00a0then bad luck had to show up in the shape of a portly man who asked if us if we were German. \u00a0Following our plan that if we were to get caught, Susanne would play mute so her German accent wouldn’t give her away, and Katsy and I would play dumb foreigners, we said no. \u00a0He spoke little English but had a few lines memorized: \u00a0“This is private property. \u00a0You are breaking the law. \u00a0Follow me.”<\/p>\n

As we followed him, our attempts at small talk were met with annoyance. \u00a0He asked me, “Are you American?” \u00a0Now, I’d been prepping myself for this question for years and I knew that if I were ever asked, I would immediately answer, “No, Canadian”. \u00a0Instead, I hear myself blurt out, “Yes” just like Ralphie when Santa asked him if he wanted a football for Christmas. \u00a0The next thing I know, the creepy man says, “Ahhhhhh, zeeee enemy!” \u00a0It was just like Hogan’s Heroes! \u00a0I pointed out to him that Germany had just beaten America in World Cup soccer, so hey, we totally suck! \u00a0Pity me! \u00a0Don’t arrest me!<\/p>\n

He opened the gate for us and told us to not come back. \u00a0Some other even creepier guy in a nearby shack yelled something unintelligible and we started walking down the road, grumbling all the way that, dammit, we didn’t even get to see all the cool stuff, grumble, who were those guys anyway, dammit, they didn’t look like security guards, grumble. But… on the bright side, these photos were captured – and you\u00a0can’t take that away from me, man!<\/p>\n